10 Costumes to Make Fun at the Ren Faire

Stop the Ninjas!

Now, before any of you accuse me of Garb Snarking, I am talking about the people that obviously meant to arrive in what they choose to arrive in.  These are not people that don’t have the right kind of sword to go with their outfit.  These are not the people that choose two different types of symbolism that only the truly geeky would spot as being incorrect.  These people, at some point chose to show up in what they chose to show up in – they dressed like that on purpose. .

I am also not recommending that we harass these people to the point that they choose not to come back to the faire.  But, I would say that they have brought the shame of what they are wearing on themselves.  They decided to wear the horrible costume and they should realize that the snickering of the Rennies and Playtrons  around them is at them and not with them.

I am also, excluding little kids from this list.  12 and under get a pass.  They can wear what they want and you are not allowed to pick on them or laugh at them (at least while they can hear you).  If they have on the plastic jumpsuit costume from Halloween, that is OK.  They are kids.

Top Ten List:

  1. stargate ren faireThe dude in the Poet shirt and blue jeans – Just look for him, he is there.  If you can’t find him, it might be you.
  2. The various versions of the Potter-verse characters – Unless they are under the age of 12.  Remember, little kids are always to be loved and protected at the faire.  They get a pass.
  3. The person that bought one piece of costuming while they were at the faire and is choosing to wear it with their street clothes.  At the Tennessee Ren Fest a few years ago, this was the guy that was wearing a Legionnaire helmet with his basketball shorts and t-shirt.
  4. And speaking of t-shirts, the person that has the breastplate printed on their t-shirt.  Great if you are trying to geek out on a night out, not so great if you are using that as your breastplate for your knight garb.
  5. The goth / emo kids that think because they are wearing robey, black outfits that they are Rennies.
  6. Cardboard Armor – While I will admit that some of this is cool, most of it looks bad/dumb and I always pray a quick rainstorm on these poor souls.
  7. The guy that obviously went through everybody’s garb boxes when they got to the faire and cobbled together a costume.  You will know him by the fact that nothing matches and he is wearing a pair of sneaks with the rest of his gear.  We all have this friend.
  8. Star Wars – I am really tired of Jedi showing up at the faire.  The next time I see Darth Whoever sporting a light-saber, I may forget that my own sword is peace -tied
  9. Star Trek – Any color, Command Yellow, Science Blue or the soon-to-be-dead Reds
  10. Ninjas – ’nuff said.  As a Pirate, I freakin’ hate ninjas.