Rosemary Quench of Three Quarters Ale versus the 10 Questions

For the next three weeks, we will be blessed to get our answers to the 10 Questions from the wonderful group known as Three Quarters Ale.

To that end, here is Rosemary’s answers to the 10 Questions:

GARF 2011 Rivka pirate croppedWhat is your favorite word?

Effervescent. Is that not a marvelous word?

What is your least favorite word? 

“Moist”. I have no objection to the state of being, mind thee, but the sound of that word sends a most unpleasant curdling sensation along the backs of my knees.

What turns you on? 

Shall I tell thee true? A man’s warm breath skittering up the back of my neck…a teasing kiss planted thereon…followed by a gentle but insistent bite. Oooohhhh, lovely.

What turns you off? 

Callousness; a general lack of regard for others.

What sound do you love? 

A well-played acoustic guitar. People laughing — preferably at my wit and not the size of my bum. The sighing sound a dog makes when it is petted and feels utterly safe and contented. (Come to think of it, it hath been remarked that I make the same sound when my hair is petted.)

What sound do you hate? 

The sound of one betwixt the ages of twelve and fifteen rolling his or her eyes. It can be faint, but if one listens closely, one can actually HEAR the disdain.

What is your favorite curse word? 

Ooooohhh, I am not at all certain I could pick just one! Though I am not known for speaking them out loud, I do devise some rather marvelous, silently-flung ones when in high dudgeon. I especially favor image-painters such as “whoreson dog-licker” and “thou rancid, perfidious pratt”. And the phrase, “OD’S BLOODY BOLLOCKS WITH KNOBS ON!!” is especially satisfying to screech mentally when I have dropped the harp on my foot.

GARF 2011 pretty at front gate CROPPEDWhat profession other than your own would you like to attempt? 

Court Jester. Oh, to have free rein to say exactly what I think! And to jump around wearing men’s attire! (Do you think the king would have my head if I wore vermillion pumpkin pants and called him a “perfidious pratt”? Eh, it might be worth it anyhow!)

What profession would you not like to do? 

Queen. Oh, certainly it SOUNDS glamourous, but to spend all one’s days arguing with the privy counselors and warding off plots to seize the crown? Bleah.

If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates? 

“My dearest Rosemary, you delightful thing…thank you for making the most of the gifts I gave you. And that wit! You have not always done what I wanted, headstrong as you are. But you never failed to make Me laugh. Sit down, My girl, and let me tell you all about My plans for you.”

 

Very, very well done.  I burst out laughing when I read the list for the first time, my wife’s least favorite word is moist as well so it cracked me up.  The next time you are at a faire and you are blessed to hear Three Quarters Ale playing, make sure to tell Rosemary hello.  After her answers, you know her a little better.

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